Immortal Quotes

Some choice quotes

With little else to do right now but wait for the advance review copies to surface–soon, honestly–I thought I’d share some of my favorite quotes from Immortal.  These are taken from various sections of the book and mostly stand on their own without need for additional context.

I’d also like to add that Adam can be followed on Twitter at @adamtheimmortal, so check him out if you enjoy his unusual pearls of wisdom.  There is also a Facebook page devoted to the novel.

And if you like any of these quotes, pass them around.  Attributed properly, of course.

I’ve been in quite a few tight situations in my long life. One of the first things I learned was if there’s going to be a mob panic, don’t be standing between the mob and wherever it is they all want to go. The second thing I learned was, don’t try to run through fire.

–Adam the Immortal

If you ever need to get someone’s undivided attention, the very best way to do it is to expose their undergarments. People are weird.

–Adam the Immortal

There was always a game, some time, somewhere, that absolutely had to be watched. ESPN may eventually be the end of Western civilization as we know it. And I should know, having witnessed the end of Western civilization at least four times.

–Adam the Immortal

…it occurred to me — not for the first time — that death was the only constant in my life. If it weren’t so depressing I’d laugh at the irony.

–Adam the Immortal

’Is this magic? Did you cast a spell or something?’
‘Of course not,’ I said. ‘There’s no such thing as magic.’
She looked at me with the kind of disbelieving expression only a vampire can give to an immortal man who doesn’t believe in magic.

–Adam the Immortal

Every time I come across a new calendar I have this bizarre need to go back and figure out when everything happened in my life according to that calendar. It’s a bit anal, but I have a whole lot of free time.

–Adam the Immortal

It is a known fact that most creatures will run in the face of a well-swung broom. Even some larger creatures, like tigers. Honest.

–Adam the Immortal

I remember when I used to be the tallest guy on an entire continent. At this rate, in another century or two, I’ll be the shortest.

–Adam the Immortal

Despite the patina of civility coating most of modern society, underneath it is a thick layer of savagery. Many people go their entire lives without even realizing it’s there. I’ve never had that luxury.

–Adam the Immortal

Something I learned a very long time ago was never interrupt a genius when he’s in the middle of something. Did that to Newton once. God that man had a temper.

–Adam the Immortal

cover by Charles Davis

Until you’ve attempted to undress a Victorian era noblewoman, you can’t possibly understand how wonderful a simple pair of cotton briefs is.

–Adam the Immortal

A word like ‘coward’ doesn’t mean anything to me. Neither does ‘brave’ or ‘valorous.’ They’re what you use to describe a dead person.

–Adam the Immortal

Like just about everything else conjured up in the past century, the underground subway system of the modern city is an unfathomable engineering miracle covered in several inches of filth, urine, and spray paint. Despite being a certified member of the human race, I’ll never fully understand why miracles of this magnitude are treated so casually.

–Adam the Immortal

I’m not a huge fan of deserts. They’re hell for my memory, for one thing, because I’m just old enough to remember when a couple of the smaller ones were bodies of water. And there’s really nothing more upsetting than to think you’re about to come up on a nice cool lake only to discover that the beach has taken over the place.

–Adam the Immortal

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No Comments

  1. kdmccrite2 on July 13, 2010 at 2:39 pm

    These are priceless! Thanks for sharing.

    • genedoucette on July 13, 2010 at 2:45 pm

      Glad you liked them. Adam always amuses me…

  2. Drew on July 13, 2010 at 2:48 pm

    Very funny. A nice, humorous look.

    @snowppl #teasertuesday

  3. Jaleta Clegg on July 13, 2010 at 4:31 pm

    Entertaining viewpoint. Now I’m intrigued about the book.

  4. Madison Woods on July 14, 2010 at 7:24 am

    I liked these. Particularly the swinging a broom at a tiger one. But I found a critter that doesn’t care what you swing at it: possums. They just hiss and bare teeth, or play dead, rather than move. LOL.

    Also like the one about human savagery beneath the patina of civilization.

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