To the gentleman crossing the street in Jamaica Plain yesterday during a DON’T WALK signal, who nearly got creamed by an SUV legally traversing the intersection, and who then turned to the cyclist that STOPPED two inches into the crosswalk SIX FEET AWAY FROM YOU and declared, “better stop for the red light, buddy,” and then, when it was clear the cyclist did not know he was being spoken to, added loudly, “pedestrians have rights too, you know!”
No, I’m sorry, you are not A moron. You are THE moron. You are what happens when God looks down upon the Earth and says to Him/Herself, “I have created many, many morons, but I feel that I have not yet created the ne plus ultra, the ultimate moron to which all other morons would be compared.” And so God reached down and blessed this world with you, THE moron.
A moron might attempt to cross when he does not have the light and nearly get run over by an SUV turning with the light. A moron might see a bike stop at a red light and decide that this was the moment to berate the bicyclist for running the red light he did not run as if he represented all bikers, everywhere, ever.
But it takes THE moron to combine these two inestimably moronic acts and perform them successively in a matter of seconds without the slightest hesitation or, one presumes, a working brain containing the definitions of hypocrisy and irony.
Thank you for your time. You may continue with your moronic day.